Auntie Diaries

[00:00.04] Heart plays in ways the mind can't figure out
[00:02.82] Heart plays in ways the mind can't figure out
[00:05.63] Heart plays in ways the mind can't figure out
[00:08.46] This is how we conceptualize human beings
[00:12.89]
[00:21.65] My auntie is a man now
[00:23.65] I think I'm old enough to understand now
[00:26.11] Drinking Paul Masson with her hat turned backwards
[00:28.87] Motorola pager off like, "Yes, Jackie"
[00:31.31] Blue Air Max's, gold chains and curl kits
[00:33.69] '93 Nissan wax job, the earliest
[00:36.26] Big social, big personality, vocal
[00:38.68] Played underground verbatim and stayed local
[00:41.67] My auntie is a man now
[00:43.53] I watch him and his girl hold their hands down
[00:45.52] Tip of the avenues under street lights made his
[00:48.08] Thinkin', "I want me a bad bitch when I get big"
[00:50.37] They walk the corner like California king
[00:52.44] Cold hand all up her skirt, cars whistling down the road
[00:55.16] See, my auntie is a man now, slight bravado
[00:57.92] Scratching the likes from lotto
[00:59.57] Hoping that she pull up tomorrow
[01:01.09] So I can hang out in the front seat
[01:03.17] Six by nines, keeping the music up under me
[01:05.46] My auntie is a man now
[01:07.04] I asked my momma why my uncles don't like him that much
[01:09.54] And at the parties why they always wanna fight him that much
[01:12.01] She said, "Ain't no telling"
[01:13.38] "Niggas always been jealous because he had more women"
[01:16.05] "More money and more attention made more envy"
[01:18.49] "Calling him anything but broke was less offendin'"
[01:21.64] My auntie is a man now
[01:23.68] I think I'm old enough to understand now
[01:26.11] Drinking Paul Masson with her hat turned backwards
[01:28.66] Back when it was comedic relief to say "faggot"
[01:31.15] Faggot, faggot, faggot, we ain't know no better
[01:33.76] Elementary kids with no filter, however
[01:36.02] My auntie became a man and I took pride in it
[01:38.26] She wasn't gay, she ate pussy, and that was the difference
[01:41.13] That's what I told my friends in second grade
[01:43.53] She picking me up from school, they stare at her in the face
[01:46.04] They couldn't comprehend what I grew accustomed
[01:48.50] We pull off bumpin' quick like it was nothing
[01:50.31] My auntie is a man now, what a relationship
[01:52.92] I grew up fast, I needed no one to babysit
[01:55.42] He gave me some cash, then gave me some gang
[01:57.34] Cherry freshener on the dash, I never complained
[01:59.79] She even cut my hair at the pad, was loving my fade
[02:02.28] The first person I seen write a rap, that's when my life had changed
[02:06.18] House full of demo, smoke stuck on the window
[02:08.65] Cameras on the microphone, all women and men though
[02:11.01] My auntie was a man now, we cool with it
[02:13.53] The history had trickled down and made us ig'nant
[02:15.94] My favorite cousin said he's returning the favor
[02:18.56] And following my auntie with the same behavior
[02:21.50] Demetrius is Mary-Ann now
[02:23.58] He's more confident to live his plan now
[02:26.10] But the family in disbelief this time
[02:28.20] Convincing themselves, "He ain't living discreet, he's fine"
[02:30.96] They said they never seen it in him, but I seen it
[02:33.55] The Barbie dolls played off the reflection of Venus
[02:36.09] He built a wall so tall you couldn't climb over
[02:38.60] He didn't laugh as hard when the kids start jokin'
[02:41.04] "Faggot, faggot, faggot," we ain't know no better
[02:43.61] Middle school kids with no filter, however
[02:45.97] I had to be very mindful of my good cousin
[02:48.19] I knew exactly who he was, but I still loved him
[02:51.38] Demetrius is Mary-Ann now
[02:53.29] I mean he's really Mary-Ann, even took things further
[02:55.75] Changed his gender, before Bruce Jenner was certain
[02:58.41] Living his truth, even if it meant see a surgeon
[03:01.02] We didn't talk for a while, he seemed more distant
[03:03.40] Wasn't comfortable around me, everything was offensive
[03:06.02] But I recall we both had a sick sense of humor
[03:08.62] Made raw, but time changes all
[03:11.31] Demetrius is Mary-Ann now
[03:13.54] Remember church, Easter Sunday?
[03:15.46] I sat in the pew, you had stronger faith
[03:17.60] More spiritual when these dudes were livin' life straight
[03:20.42] Which I found ironic 'cause the pastor didn't see him the same
[03:23.32] He said my cousin was goin' through some things
[03:25.45] He promised the world we livin' in was an act on abomination and Demetrius was to blame
[03:30.32] I knew you was conflicted by the feelings a preacher made
[03:33.17] Wonderin' if God still call you a decent man
[03:35.41] Still, you found the courage to be subservient just to anoint
[03:38.60] Until he singled you out to prove his point, sayin'
[03:41.46] "Demetrius is Mary-Ann now"
[03:43.39] Church, his auntie is a man now, it hurt
[03:46.59] He the most 'cause his belief was close to his words
[03:49.05] Forcing me to stand now
[03:50.74] I said, "Mr. Preacher man, should we love thy neighbor?"
[03:53.64] "The laws of the land or the heart, what's greater?"
[03:56.05] "I recognize the study she was taught since birth"
[03:58.25] "But that don't justify the feelings that my cousin preserved"
[04:00.98] The building was thinking out loud, bad angel
[04:03.55] That's when you looked at me and smiled, said, "Thank you"
[04:06.01] The day I chose humanity over religion
[04:08.57] The family got closer, it was all forgiven
[04:11.02] I said them F-bombs, I ain't know any better
[04:13.43] Mistakenly, I didn't think you'd know any different
[04:15.94] See, I was taught words was nothing more than a sound
[04:18.26] If everything was pronounced without any intentions
[04:20.98] If every second, you challenge the shit I was kicking
[04:23.59] Reminded me about a show I did out the city
[04:26.08] That time I brung a fan on stage to rap
[04:28.52] But disapproved the word that she couldn't say with me
[04:31.03] You said, "Kendrick, ain't no room for contradiction"
[04:33.59] "To truly understand love, switch position"
[04:36.19] "Faggot, faggot, faggot," we can say it together
[04:38.50] But only if you let a white girl say, "Nigga"
[04:40.66]