Tell Me, Ernest

[00:05.61] So tell me, Ernest
[00:07.93] What would you do to me? Aesthetically?
[00:10.96] A lift, a tuck, a freeze, a suck, some filler in the chin?
[00:14.75] Oh, goodness, no
[00:15.85] No, really. Tell me, Ernest
[00:18.10] If you had your way with me, medically
[00:20.76] Are we talking face, chest, thighs, breasts?
[00:23.50] Oh God, I don't know where to begin
[00:26.09] What about this vein on my leg?
[00:28.26] I stressed it out from doing squats on the reg
[00:31.38] Do you have time on Tuesday to squeeze me in?
[00:35.17] I told you, Ernest doesn't really do that
[00:37.22] But she's a friend, Tuesday's doable
[00:39.63] Mmm, doable, huh?
[00:41.57] So tell me, Ernest
[00:43.36] How much have you seen of me, cinematically?
[00:46.54] The roms, the coms, the rom-coms
[00:49.06] The dramas, the dramadies (the straight-to-DVD's?)
[00:51.51] No really, Ernest, how often have you watched me?
[00:55.06] Uh, sporadically
[00:56.58] What?
[00:57.06] I really liked the one where you were fighting with a sword
[00:58.35] Oh, "Thrust"
[00:59.23] That was her first Razzie award
[01:00.94] You know, I did all my own stunts
[01:03.10] I only injured all of my co-stars once
[01:06.28] Now swordplay foreplay is one of my specialities
[01:09.94] We need another bottle
[01:11.69] I must be boring you senseless
[01:16.74] I'm just so thrilled that you both are here
[01:22.08] Treat her well, I haven't seen Hel this happy in years
[01:27.21] Well, here, here
[01:28.66] Thank you, bye, that's sincere
[01:31.75] Cheers
[01:33.96] I'm so glad we did this
[01:37.62] Well, this has been so much fun, but oh gosh, look at the time
[01:41.85] Oh please, you don't have anywhere else to be
[01:44.13] Our Helen, always worrying
[01:46.92] But tell me, Ernest
[01:49.04] How's Helen in the sack?
[01:50.20] Mad
[01:50.90] Just curious
[01:52.11] I've known this girl for twenty years
[01:53.72] And never have I ever heard her make a uh-uh-woah
[01:56.93] Hey
[01:57.49] Oh, lighten up, Ernest
[01:59.48] We should be heading back
[02:00.47] Uh-oh, she's furious
[02:02.25] Come on, Hel
[02:03.20] You know I'm just having fun (Another glass?)
[02:06.13] Ooh, we've only begun
[02:08.25] A toast to friends for life
[02:10.16] That's right, you're stuck with me, Ernie
[02:12.19] Thank your wife
[02:13.49] Well its been fun, but we gotta go
[02:16.21] I think I'm done, gotta hit the road
[02:18.79] I must be boring you senseless (oh we must be boring you)
[02:23.86] I'm just so thrilled that were out of here (I'm just so thrilled that you both are here)
[02:28.74] We should do this again
[02:31.80] How's next week?
[02:33.39] How's next year?
[02:36.03] Cheers, cheers
[02:39.90] I'm so glad (so glad, so fucking glad)
[02:47.96] We did this
[02:49.69]