I Love Work

[00:14.20] Woke up this morning a little too early,
[00:16.26] A little too tired, a little too surly.
[00:18.61] Guess I got up on the wrong side of the bed
[00:20.87] When I shoulda stayed in it instead.
[00:22.64] But I gotta go to work 'cause I love it
[00:24.19] Oh how I wanna tell the boss to shove it
[00:25.91] No matter how I want to crash
[00:27.84] Need abundance of funds when it comes to cash.
[00:29.82] So I wash my face with a little bit of water
[00:31.52] To wake me up
[00:32.57] ('Does it work?' 'Yeah, sorta.')
[00:33.57] Inspect the reflection, check my eyes -
[00:35.15] They're bloodshot, that's no surprise.
[00:37.11] So I wake up every day the same way,
[00:38.87] No matter what time I hit the hay
[00:40.53] Fall asleep at like seven o'clock
[00:42.50] And I wake up tired wearing dirty socks, thinking.
[00:44.73] I love (I love work)
[00:46.62] Work (I love work)
[00:49.53]
[00:53.68] I love (Geez, I love work)
[00:56.19] Work
[00:59.20] Put my shoes on, strap them up,
[01:00.92] Put on my shorts, scratch my nut,
[01:02.82] Put on my shirt, get something to eat
[01:04.43] And then I'm out the door and I'm into the street.
[01:06.71] Driving my car, still putting my clothes on,
[01:08.60] When I realise I left the stove on.
[01:10.56] I'm gonna be late if I have to go home,
[01:12.06] But I got no choice so I'll bust a U-bone
[01:14.05] At the buisiest intersection,
[01:16.11] Probably starting to wish that I'd slept in -
[01:17.77] 'Cause now a cop is pulling me over,
[01:19.51] And I'm quite sure that I'm not quite sober.
[01:21.62] But he's happy just giving me a ticket
[01:23.34] When he pisses off I'm gonna flick it
[01:25.25] Out the window and go to work wired
[01:26.92] Hope I don't get fired for being so tired.
[01:29.25] A quarter to is when i'm supposed to start,
[01:30.58] But I'm looking at my watch and it's quarter past.
[01:32.33] Boss's telling me to get off my ass,
[01:34.07] But it's against my religion to be working fast.
[01:36.06] So I said another company has made some offers,
[01:37.89] If you want me to stay, 'I need a new office!'
[01:39.93] He's fuming and foaming at the mouth
[01:41.67] When he reminded of the stove at my house.
[01:43.57] Never went back to turn it off
[01:45.55] Because I got sidetracked, interacting with the cop,
[01:47.46] I'm telling my boss how a fire might burn my house and my stuff and the money that I've earned.
[01:50.91] Thought it was a lie, wouldn't let me go home,
[01:52.78] So I quit my job to save everything I own.
[01:54.83] Bust him in the eye and called him a jerk
[01:56.40] When it got me to thinking - I love work.
[01:58.48] I love (I love work)
[02:02.06] Work (I love work)
[02:05.82] I love (Geez, I love work)
[02:09.50] Work
[02:13.06] Speeding home, I got pulled over again,
[02:14.72] By the same cop saying, 'Well if it isn't my old friend!'
[02:16.97] Looked him in the eye, told him the truth -
[02:18.32] So he came to my house to check the proof.
[02:20.67] And there's the roof, fully ablaze;
[02:22.39] I guess I'm just having one of those days.
[02:24.30] I lost my job, my house burned down,
[02:25.88] And I got two tickets from the same clown.
[02:27.91] All my memories are up in smoke,
[02:29.74] All my enemies are fucking stoked,
[02:31.72] 'Cause now I've got nothing left
[02:33.62] And I can't even collect a counter check,
[02:35.19] Because for that, you need ID,
[02:36.71] And the Centrelink staff don't recognise me.
[02:38.85] Still have a hangover, my head hurts,
[02:40.66] But none of this would have happened if I didn't go to work.
[02:44.47]
[03:12.76] Now I wake up in the afternoon,
[03:14.85] Hardly ever even leave my room,
[03:16.89] Unless I need to shit or piss
[03:18.53] Or eat something, 'cause I don't wanna miss
[03:20.43] Jerry Springer, Ricki Lake;
[03:22.04] I don't wanna clean the mess that I make.
[03:23.98] I'm allowed and proud to be a slob -
[03:25.64] It's all part of the parcel of my new job.
[03:27.70] I can wake up with serious bed hair,
[03:29.72] I don't brush it, it just sits there.
[03:31.54] The main concern is I get enough sleep
[03:33.19] And I hand my form in every couple of weeks,
[03:35.08] Cos the government pays for me to stay home
[03:36.85] And I much prefer to be on my own.
[03:38.99] I got tired of being a clerk
[03:40.64] But now - I love work.
[03:43.37] I love (I love work)
[03:46.46] Work (I love work)
[03:50.06] I love (Geez, I love work)
[03:53.74] Work
[03:55.50]